The Longest Days

Carson brought back the groceries this time. We took turns.

A few cardboard ‘tall boys’ of juice. Pineapple, apple. Cherry was my favorite. He brought a jar of olives, a bag of olives, a bag of pistachios. Some stuff for Greek salad too. A block of feta.

We’d lost count of the days by now. Somewhere between seven and nine. Can’t remember. We haven’t moved.

The days would pass in near silence. We rarely chatted, save dinner. Even card games were a hushed matter.

Late in the afternoons, the wind would pickup. Just enough to cool you off in the sun. I'd lay reading or napping. Switching between the two until it was time to walk to dinner.

I’d tap through one of the few hundred novels I’d pirated on my Kindle. Booked this spot with the idea I’d read for 2 weeks straight. 

With no words spoken and goggles in had, Sean would step down the rock stairs to the beach. He’d float around for 15 minutes. Mist would blow my direction from the outdoor shower. Our neighbors puffed on a cig. Speaking Italian, I think.

The wifi only worked well if you were inside or at the patio table. They streamed animal. Scrolled social media. Pistachio shells clicked. Fingers rustled for more.

Some days I had peace of mind there some days I thought about her all day. Some days I regretted that I was there.

Down the shore, you could see the public beach. Vacationers. German for some reason. The cover band at the bar idd English covers with a German accent on a Greek island.

Families go there early. Pretty girls and boys in university showed up later in the day. The sun sat on their side of the cove before ours. We had the longest days.

Nights, we would shuffle to one of the few restaurants. Always sat outside. In Greece, you go look at the menu options in the kitchen. Sitting behind glass, you decide what dishes call out to you. The chef smokes and chats with a waiter in there.

Our waiter is Albanian. Lots of Albanians here. Mostly working. He tries to tell us jokes in his 3rd language. The food here is better than Italy. Way better. He gives us free shots after the last course. Everything is served family style.

I turn my headlamp on to return home. Dinner is the best part of the day. Meals in general. We wait for meals.

Carson is going to meet Sean and I at breakfast. We there first.

I only ever order an iced espresso. Freddo espresso they call it. Sean gets a cappuccino. Has been getting one or two a day. Since Switzerland I think. He’ll get one daily for the next 8 weeks abroad.

The guy that owns this cafe is Greek. His accents throws us off. He speaks with a charming cadence. It is songlike. Sounds like he is singing to you.

The menu is short. More coffee options than entrees. It’s always eggs, pancakes, or yogurt. We had determined the omelette was the best thing to order. Carson shows up.

We play Golf the card game until food arrives. It’s the only game where I can regularly beat the boys. Sean still wins most games.

Ub the army part if the day and at night, you hear bells clanking. Goats. I’ve only ever seen them once or twice. Sounds like they are behind the hill. Maybe on top. 

The bedroom glows. We watch videos or scroll til we fall asleep. I take the big bed. I paid for the AirBnb.

Carson has to leave one morning to go back. He still has a job. Now there are two of us. Sean and I debate about Christianity and God for three hours at dinner.

We are trapped here it feels like. Stuck. A tiny town hidden on a Greek island. Looking out to sea, there is nothing. I wished she was here.

I cannot enjoy this place fully until she is here with me.

We cant on the phone while I stargaze on the roof. She just got off work. It’s still August. I live in a swimsuit. Never been this tan. After we hangup, I re-listen to a song cover she sent me. I play it on loop and stare up to the Heavens. It doesn’t move. All is stuck here.

We are fixing to hit the road. Put down some miles. Get into trouble. We debate ditching the reservation. We translate our schedules. Speculate on their meaning. He spends the day mending his bag. Sewing on a new place to hang a water bottle. In his EarPods he listens to an audiobook.

Harder to focus here than I thought. I chug cherry juice and bottled water. Sun isn’t overhead yet. I nervously wait for messages. Should have gotten a place with no WiFi. Should have brought her with me.

Big bowl of yogurt with sliced peaches, dried figs, and globs of honey. I send a photo to my mom. I scroll. I eat around ten. We go to breakfast at 10:45. I meet him there. 

We debate nutrition. Talk about friends back home. Try to make sense of it all. Forgot to bring the cards today.

The waitress looks like someone I know. There are ads for yoga classes and boat cruises at the cash register. We see the same people each day. Same German families. Same food.

We live in the moment. We wonder how to spend our days. Vacations is agony. Friends back home are envious after seeing videos of our beach-front shack. 

We make more coffee. We are ‘over it it’. The rest of the trip is uncertain. Ideas of heading more south are discussed. The expedition needs to eventually head back to the mainland. We need to get off this island.